January 2012
190 posts
December 2011
406 posts
Your God is Fear: Things that are patronizing and offensive to the autistic community: An annotated list. →
agirlcalledhome.tumblr.com
1. Autism Speaks
Autism Speaks is the patronizer of patronizers. They expressly state that their goal is to “cure” autism for the sake of the autistic community which they “speak” for; in reality, Autism Speaks is a bunch of neurotypicals projecting their feelings onto us.
2. Autism Awareness…
Bitter Grapes: No, alright, listen. →
bittergrapes.tumblr.com
If you laugh at racist jokes or tell them, you are racist.
If you laugh at sexist jokes or tell them, you are sexist.
If you laugh at cissexist jokes or tell them, you are cissexist.
So on and so on.
There is no difference between hate and humor, because humor is a powerful form of…
As an SJ person with a vile sense of humor, I know there are ways to make fun of people without being a bigot. Laugh at what they do, not what they are. Make fun of ignorance in people who should know better,* people in the public eye who are constantly putting their feet in their mouths,* and people who get into trouble because they ignore good advice and examples for trivial reasons*. You can make fun of me for talking to my malfunctioning printer this morning.
*Remember the Soviet Union slips from presidential candidates and every chemist who has ever put foil in the microwave.
*Rick Perry is a great example.
*Think of the girl I played with in high school who refused to set her feet apart when she was trying to handle a sousaphone whose bell was perpendicular to a thirty mile an hour wind. She said it looked silly. She looked silly anyway when she was repeatedly launched into the chain link fence behind us.
Thank you so much for offering your help. I have a 4 year old nephew whom I am very worried about, his behaviors have been causing us to be very concerned. My first question is, is it possible for autism to be noticed at the age of 4? All of the articles I read are of autism being noticed at the age of 2 years or younger.
It certainly can be noticed that late. I have been reading articles lately that question the accuracy of diagnoses that assign the child a specific place on the spectrum, i.e. HFA, LFA, etc., that happen so early. It is hard to tell anything about a child that early. Get him diagnosed if you think the services would help him. If he comes out of the tests with a label, remember that he is the same kid he was before. All that has changed is that you have more tools for formulating strategies to help him.
The good news is that autism is not the worst thing that could happen to your family. These may take the edge off the worry:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/26/us/navigating-love-and-autism.html?_r=1
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=the-hidden-potential-of-autistic-kids
http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v479/n7371/full/479033a.html
Try to make sure the goal of anyone who works with him is to help him live comfortably and maximize his potential, not to change him. You may not have a choice. Look for that if you do. I would be lying if I said it would be easy. The world is unkind to people who are different. Your nephew clearly has you in his corner. His loving family improves his prospects wherever he falls on the spectrum and gives him a solid chance at a decent life.
I am. I am. I am.: kristinescribbles: dear social services, i know a twelve-year-old girl... →
goldenheartedrose.tumblr.com
dear social services, i know a twelve-year-old girl who has basically raised herself because her parents are nonfunctional alcoholics. where are you on that one? why are you bothering my boyfriend, a well-adjusted twenty-five-year-old man who happens to have asperger’s…
Call her supervisor.
“Memoirs on autism also frequently mention the parents’ distress at seeing the spark gradually go out of the eyes of their child as language skills regress and he or she retreats into a self-enclosed world—the dreaded prison of autos, the root meaning of autism.
We took my son on a pilgrimage to the Bronx for an evaluation three months after he had a frightening regression in March. He had been receiving early-intervention services for three months and was improving, and then the light in his eyes began to go out. He stopped looking in my eyes, and when I caught his chin in my hand to look in his face, there was nothing there. He was irritable and spun in circles most of the time, and when he did sit down, he kept pushing the same button on a musical toy over and over and couldn’t be engaged. He didn’t even like his beloved books anymore. My son was gone—there was no spark in his face, no sign of life, just dead eyes.
” —Little Boy Lost by Amy Leal
I’m a so-called “regressive autistic”. I lost language skills when I was a small child. I also experienced something rarer, in that I also lost a bunch of different skills including speech, gradually starting in early adolescence.
Thing is, I’m still here. I’m not dead even though people have described my eyes in that and even more offensive ways. I would still be here even if I lost the typed language that I still have. The essence of who I am does not depend on facial expression, on my ability to command my body and have it do my bidding, on whether I have access to using or understanding any language at all. In fact, during the time period when I began losing skills, something else was going on. I was getting more in touch with who I really am. The skills that I find the most important — skills most people can’t even fathom existing — have been honing themselves more and more over time. Some of this is not coincidence. Some of what is required to use those skills is the absence or lessening of others.
But even if the things most important to me were not becoming stronger. Even if who I am was not being distilled down to a more and more intense essence with every passing year. Even if I was not becoming happier, more ethical, more in touch with the world around me in ways most people can’t imagine. I would still be a person. I would still be myself. I would still have life, heart, love, and soul thoroughly intact. And it would still be really fucking offensive to refer to people like me as if we were dead, not really there, and losing ourselves, just because we move or communicate or think in ways different than we used to.
To quote a good friend of mine, also autistic: I’m the one who has to live with the stereotypes you are trying to build. I live or die depending on whether people think I’m actually still here or not. No really — live or die. Already survived one attempt of murder-through-neglect by people who were tasked with taking care of me. They thought the real me was gone too. They wanted me to not be in their mental institution because they would rather treat people who were going to get better. They said these things openly in my presence because I was not enough of a person for them to care. Across the world, autistic people die all the time. Often at the hands of caregivers and parents. When you make us sound less human, less alive, less ourselves, that has the same effect it has on any other group of people: Our lives matter less. People openly kill us because we are not the people they think we used to be, not their real children anymore. So when you say things like this it’s just one more piece that tips things in the direction of our unpersonhood.
And even when not life and death… some of the worst things anyone has said to me were things like “I want the old you back.” The me who was able to do more things. Because people want me to at least seem less disabled. And there’s this thing where who I am now is never good enough. They want the old me. Even if that’s the me who was truly lost and confused. Even if that was a horribly unhappy time in my life. Better to be unhappy and “higher functioning” than happy and “lower functioning”. It tears my heart to pieces when people want the “old me”, no matter how innocent they think it is. (It also suggests they value form over function: Someone who can speak but barely communicate is apparently better than someone who can communicate but barely speak.)
This is all so close to home that it terrifies me. In a world where people like me are already dehumanized. Which leads directly to abuse and murder even when the dehumanization is unintended as such. We can’t afford for people to be spreading this idea that when we “regress”, we lose who we are and all signs of life. And seriously… have you ever had anyone tell you your eyes are empty and dead, your face shows nothing there, you are clearly missing out on what life has to offer, you have the cognitive functioning of an infant, there’s no person inside you, you’re just an empty shell? Because I have, to my face, and it’s more horrifying than any loss of skills could ever be.
(via beyondemptyshells)
Does anyone know anything about autism?
I’ve been reading stuff online and learning more about it, but it would be helpful if I could learn more from people with personal experience.
Racist jokes, sexist jokes, ableist jokes, cissexist jokes, heterosexist jokes = instant unfollow.
Problem solved.
Seriously. It’s your blog? Cool! Doesn’t make it any less shitty to post offensive and immature jokes. And it’s a weak defense.
I’m willing to give you the benefit of the doubt, but saying “I will post what I want!1!11!!” just proves that you don’t actually give a fuck about being a discriminatory asshole, and thus makes me lose all respect for you. Hence the unfollow.
For Those Of You With Autism
Do you have any tips on how to stop/prevent sensory overload? It only happens when I try to drive- I inevitably get tired after ten minutes because it’s so draining, the movements are really hard for me to coordinate, I have to watch a bazillion different things, etc.
Any similar experiences/advice would be really helpful, because I wanna get this driving thing down XD Thanks, guys.
Consider turning off the radio and using earplugs or use music if it helps. Never drive without sunglasses if light and glare are problems. If I have to drive into a rising or setting sun, I have steampunked welding goggles. The best thing is to find a safe place to experiment and see what works for you.
Trish of all Trades: Sneak in some end of the year good juju... →
trishofalltrades.tumblr.com
… and donate a couple bucks (or more if you can afford it), to some really awesome organizations in your neighborhood.
I’ve been getting a lot of end of the year newsletters from non-profits that I’ve been involved with in some way and since I can’t donate to all of them, I’m hoping some folks…
Please stop encouraging people to donate to Autism Speaks. Read this:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2007/05/19/336513/-An-Autistic-Speaks-About-Autism-Speaks
Most autistic people want them to go away.
Okay, Mr. Puka Shell Necklace. Show me the light.: goldenheartedrose: ectosharkologist: not to mention! people who... →
doctorsheldoncooperforthewin.tumblr.com
not to mention! people who require the use of screen readers would probably find trigger warnings re: things that trigger them but are “not inherently bad” extremely useful! especially if they couldn’t get tumblr savior or things like that to…
This is how I see it: Trigger warnings annoy me. They are one more thing to remember. Sometimes, I forget and have to go back and add them. However, my mild annoyance is nothing compared to what someone else might feel if I neglect to use them. They are worth it.
Wow you have some serious aspirations. Tuba, LSAT, Autism... I sifted through your blog for a little while and wondered how did u get so involved in Autism? I love to learn and you seem like someone who could possibly show me something new. On top of that--- TUBA! How did u start playing that?? Happy Holidays!
I got interested in autism issues when I found out I had been diagnosed with Asperger’s at age six. I found out as a teen. Between, I had paperwork that allowed me to type instead of writing by hand, which was painful for me. Every time it had to be renewed, school officials interrupted my life and terrorized me for weeks. Since my parents hid my diagnosis, I never knew why. I was raised as a fragile child. Only a few “ignorant” adults in my life knew too little about labels to consider me a kid, not a tragedy. University of Chicago “experts” told my parents not to expect me to amount to much. That was the course my life took until a band director forced me to play tuba.
I went in thinking it was an outlandish idea that could never work. I got home and told my parents to start saving up to buy me a horn. I had been shy, sedentary, bullied, and miserable for most of my life. Suddenly, I was doing backbreaking work, making snap decisions with no margin for error. Freed of my learned helplessness, I became type-A* with a vengeance, started doing well in school, got hopelessly overscheduled, and entered my current state of chronic sleep deprivation. Once I crawled out of my own rut, I felt called to help others. The best way for me to be the protector I lacked as a child involves a law degree.
Happy holidays to you, too.
*Yes, I know that is not a real thing.
I am. I am. I am.: Note to allistics on the autism tag →
goldenheartedrose.tumblr.com
If you write something offensive, and we call you out on it, the best idea is to reblog it and apologize, or at the very least, make a new post and apologize and tag that with autism too.
I can’t speak for anyone else, but when someone writes something either offensive or just plain misguided…
Thamblr: Question about autism →
thambos.tumblr.com
Do any of you have good resources to learn about autism? Or how to be an ally for people with autism?
I find myself constantly questioning how the label is being used because while I’ve met a few people with Asbergers and such I’ve only met three people who I knew were autistic as opposed to AS…
Autism is the whole spectrum of what you have seen, from aspies like me who start talking before eighteen months and never stop to people who never talk at all. Many people find it confusing. Ask us questions. We will answer them.
Why do people have such strange reactions to finding out I play tuba?
I am a girl who plays tuba.
Why is that any more shocking than a person who plays bassoon? Nobody likes bassoon. Not even most of the people who play it.
But a girl tuba player? Shock of their life.
It’s not even that uncommon.
I’m the only girl tuba player at my college.
But there are only 8 tuba players there, in total.
And there are over 400 music majors.
Am I missing something?
When people call kids who have Autism “Autistic,” it really bothers me. That’s not the proper way to address them. Say they have Autism. It’s more respectful.
Did you know that some kids who have Autism know they have that disability?
Not many people do.
So, next time you hear someone call another person “Autistic,” correct them. Do that favor for me.
Next time you interact with someone on the spectrum, ask what they want to be called if it is possible. I am not a person with autism. I am autistic. It is a fundamental part of who I am that society decided to label and other. It is an inextricable part of my nature, not an external thing stacked on top.
Please stop saying “kids with autism” or “autistic kids” when you mean “people with autism” or “autistic people.” We grow up.
Hello again.
Voice of inspiration: Mother believes autistic son's singing is a true miracle →
chronicle.augusta.com
The family says their son blossomed once they started trying for a happy child, not a “normal” one. There is a lesson here.
Your God is Fear: Autism and Christmas (and holidays in general). →
agirlcalledhome.tumblr.com
So, in case anyone here in the Western Hemisphere missed the news, tonight is Christmas Eve; this means, of course, that tomorrow is Christmas day.
I can’t remember well the last time that I enjoyed Christmas. Compared to previous years, this season has been fairly good to me; but I’m still…
Add a month of obligatory carols for pay and the anniversary of a loved one’s death and this is my Christmas experience.
the truth about autistics:
we’re all different. we all have our own experiences. stop trying to make us all fit in the same box.
TW Abuse, Ableism Flutterfly Invasion: Why Abuse of Disabled Students Needs to Stop (and it needs to stop RIGHT. NOW.) →
flutterflyinvasion.tumblr.com
There has been a disturbing flurry of incidents breaking out lately about school staff abusing disabled students. The latest one involves an autistic student being PUT INSIDE A DUFFEL BAG with the drawstring pulled tight OUT IN THE HALLWAY. With gym balls. Like he was no better than a piece…
I want no part of your feminism unless it applies to:
- gay women
- queer women
- poor women
- trans* women
- women of color
- non-western women
- men (yes, feminism is about men too)
Feminism is about gender equality. The moment you erase anyone just because it doesn’t make for as catchy a slogan, you’ve kinda missed the point.
And
- disabled women
- non-binary folk
- everyone
And
- people of all ages
Oh, hey.: I swear with my generation, it's a craze to have a mental illness of some sort. →
madness-is-the-emergency-exit.tumblr.com
madness-is-the-emergency-exit:
- Depression
- Schizophrenia
- Psychosis
- Multi-personality
- Bi-polar
- Social anxiety
And so many more, but I just can’t remember.
I really don’t see the point in ‘claiming’ to have a serious mental illness. What about the people who actually have it? I doubt they use it to get attention or…thank you for this. i would give so much to not have social anxiety, amongst a crap of other Dx. i would give anything. i feel like a useless piece of scrap flesh.
I will never go parading around telling people of my mental illnesses like its something to be praised of some sort for attention. Never.
Let me get this straight. As a person without mental illness, you get to decide what people with mental illness do. You know everything there is to know about that. Since you are the expert, you know no one with a real mental illness would ever seek friendship and support in safety by doing it under a pseudonym online. I have friends who live with mental illness. This would offend them.
I didn’t even read the rest of the post until now -__-
All I saw was “doubt they use it for attention”. but then I read “Posting over tumblr, telling the world on Facebook, or even posting weird shit on Twitter is not going to get you anywhere. ” and then I read “And admit there’s nothing wrong with your brain or you” and now I’m a bit peeved.
I sometimes skip it for the sake of time, too, but it often pays to read the OP.
I have pretty bad social anxiety and I’m pretty comfortable telling my friends about it. I guess that means I’m doing it for attention because if I really had social anxiety I wouldn’t tell anyone…right? I’m assuming that’s what she’s saying -_________- I don’t tell my friends about my problems because I know I need help. I tell them because I want them to understand me. Lol I usually skim through things. Bleh probably shouldn’t. Saves me from being annoyed usually.
I agree. I love the way the OP perpetuates stigma against mental illness in the name of helping the “real sufferers.”
